13 psychological tricks that make people respect you.

What's going on everyone? Welcome, or welcome back to the Improvement for Embezzles podcast. I'm your podcast host Natalie etched and in today's podcast, we are going to be talking about 13 psychological tricks to make people respect you. And if you happen to be new here, we do things a little bit different here on my channel. This is where I share ways in which I'm getting my shit together so that you can get your shit together. Meaning these are all things I'm realizing as I'm making this video. Or not exactly as I'm making this video, but as of recently, I've really been focusing on my own self-respect and wanting to gain other people's respect. For a lot of my life, I've thought, you know, respect has to be earned. I'm going to tell you guys right now, that is all backwards. That is all brainwashing. I used to go out of my way to do all of these things for people who I wanted to respect me because I didn't respect myself. I'm going to clarify something really, really fast. So yes, you do have to give respect in order to get respect. But going out of your way to make someone respect you is a waste of your time. Recognize when someone is disrespecting you and place them accordingly. Just realize that I try to avoid being redundant in this video. Obviously, give people basic respect, use your manners, say please and thank you. Those are obvious ways to make people respect you on a basic level. However, don't go out of your way to make someone who's disrespecting you, respect you, remove your energy, and focus to people who actually do give you respect. Okay, back to the video. Gaining other people's respect has everything to do with the level of self-respect you have inside and how you react to other people who happen to disrespect you. Even if they're not consciously disrespecting you, you still need to choose to act in a certain way so that you can prove to yourself and others that you are not to be played with. And if you're coming back to my channel, I know the type of person you are. I know you're not the type of person to misuse your respect or misuse power. You are the type of person to sit back and just let people do whatever to you. And I'm going to tell you right now, Bestie. After this video, you are going to find a new level of respect for yourself and you are going to start standing up for what you believe in. Because I'm tired of it. Okay, I see how people have been treating you. I see how you've been going out of your way, breaking your back so that people acknowledge the type of person you are and your big, huge heart. And I know you just want to give, give, give. But Bestie, let me tell you, not everyone is to be given to. So before we get into all of those psychological tricks, I want to discuss what respect is because a lot of people get it confused. Respect is a feeling or a deep admiration for someone's capabilities. Respect also has an aspect of it that is a regard for someone's feelings. Okay, to have people regard your feelings, you must first have to regard your own feelings. Respect is less about who you are and more about how you make people feel. It has nothing to do with how old you are. It has nothing to do with how you look into society. It has nothing to do with where you come from or where you're going. Respect is purely based on how you reflect back other people themselves. If other people can see themselves in you, they will naturally have a greater respect for you. This is why people who go out of their way to demand respect often lose respect from people. Think about that one overly bearing boss telling you, like, I need your respect. Like, do you side eye them and go, you're not being respectful to me? Why would I be respectful to you? That is what I mean. It is a lot less about who you actually are and more about your demeanor and how you choose to respect yourself. Which brings me into the first psychological trick. When you walk into the room, let people know who you are. If you do not introduce yourself, the second that you step into a room, you're not someone that's worth knowing. Sit on that. Like, truly sit on that. I understand that you might be a shy person. You might be more of an introvert, but just by not introducing yourself, you are just going to stand there and not be heard and not be someone that is acknowledged. Obviously, read the room, but oftentimes, if you introduce yourself to people and take the time to let people know who you are, you are more rememberable to them and you are also more respectable to them because it shows I'm not someone who will just sit back and let myself not be known. Which brings me into number two, try to remember people's names. And this is something that I am learning a lot more as I go out and I go to these various events I'm going to and introduce myself to people to network. What helps me remember people's names is also getting their social media handle. We live in a world where it's very easy to not remember people's names. We all have our own agenda for the day, right? We all have things that we're doing for ourselves, but simply remembering someone's name, especially if there's someone that's important, helps you because if you meet them again and you remember their name and they don't happen to remember your name, they will remember your name the second time. A trick that helps me remember people's names is when they introduce themselves to me. I say their name. I say nice to meet you blank. Their name. You know what I mean? Like I say their name as they're introducing them to me. And then throughout the interaction, I'll use their name. When you use someone's name, you are acknowledging them directly, which means that they are more likely to remember you. Number three, this one's very obvious, fix your posture. If you walk into the room with your shoulders back and your standing straight, you're walking with confidence, you have a purpose. People are more likely to see you and acknowledge you, rather than when your posture is down and you're looking to the ground. It just looks a lot better, and it also makes you feel a lot better. Like before you walk into any room, even if you have a lot of nerves, walk into the room, like you are meant to be in that room. Even say to yourself, if you're that nervous, say, I am meant to be in this room. Number four, always stay busy. Don't be too easily available. When you say yes to everything, your time becomes less valuable because people are seeing you all of the time. And oftentimes we do this because we fear that we're going to be forgotten about if we leave. But in reality, it's the opposite. When people don't see us, especially people who are hoping to see us on an event, when they see that we haven't showed up, they'll ask, you know, like, what are they doing? And the next time you're there, they will make use of your time. Just never be the person that's just like laying around doing nothing. Even if you are laying around doing nothing, make it up. Like say that you're doing something. Also when you're too easily available, it also shows that you're like desperate. And that's not the idea you want to give. If you want people to respect you, you cannot be desperate. Number five, if someone disrespects your time, this is so important. Okay, if you feel like your time is being disrespected. Don't be so willing to reschedule or just be easily available after that. And what I mean is, let's say someone cancels on you very, very last minute. Check for a couple of things. Number one, are they a apologetic of the fact that they had to cancel? Did they provide you a reason? Because if they provided you a reason, that shows that most likely they are being genuine. You know, give people the benefit of the doubt. However, remind them of these things. Did you have to text them first to remind them of certain plans? Is this a pattern? Do they always flake on you? Are they a business connection or are they a friend connection? Because it's different if someone who's actually beneficial to you maybe keep it in mind for next time, but have them be the one that reaches out to reschedule or make other plans with you. Be like, we'll see. You know, we'll see if I have time this month. I'm really booked in busy this month, but you know, I might be able to make time for you. Don't make things a big deal, but also recognize what place this person is in your life. And don't be afraid to kind of distance yourself if someone has constantly proven to you that they will always flake on you. Except people how they are, place them where they belong. Number six, replace sorry with thank you. Especially if it's something that is a small mistake of yours. I think a lot of us misuse the term sorry. And I used to be one of these people. I would always be like, oh my god, I'm so sorry for things that I didn't even know I was supposed to do. Maybe it was just a mistake, right? Think of the term sorry for actually taking accountability for something like you did something wrong. Don't always say it for the most minor inconveniences. Like if you drop something don't be like, oh my god, sorry, or if someone says, hey, you should do this instead of this. Thank you. I'll keep that in mind for next time. It's a lot more classy than saying, I'm sorry for things that were just genuine mistakes. If you say sorry all the time too, it devalues when you actually mean I'm sorry. And this is something I really, really had to learn because I would always be the type of person saying, oh my god, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry. And I realized like I wasn't actually sorry. It was like a trained response from other people in my life who trained me to always take accountability for even something that I didn't do. I highly suggest that you do some shadow work behind that too because a lot of the times I recognized the reason I would always say sorry is because I literally felt guilty for just like taking up space. Number seven, take accountability for when you actually do something wrong. This will show character. Okay, when you know you are in the wrong and you say sorry, number one, people will know that you have the ability to self reflect and the ability to know that you are not perfect, right? Like we are all human, we are not perfect. However, we have to acknowledge that fact and be able to own up to all of our tacky shit. Nobody likes having people in their life that have no self awareness of when they messed up. When you are arrogant and you deflect all the time and you never ever take accountability for your tacky shit, people will notice that and in fact, people will distance themselves from you. When you can acknowledge how your actions impacted people and really truly take accountability for that and feel remorse for what you did. Even if people are angry at you, they will respect the fact that you owned up to what you did. They will respect the fact that you had the courage to be like yeah, that was shitty and I'm sorry. Number eight, stand in your authenticity. Authenticity is one of the purest energies that you can work around. Like if you know you're being authentic to yourself and what you believe in, everything falls into place. Everything aligns with you. Authenticity also means acknowledging the parts of you that aren't really that healed yet, acknowledging the parts of you that you don't really like looking at. Irrigence is loud, confidence is quiet. When you know yourself, when you know you have things to work on, when you can see yourself for everything you are, the mistakes, the good qualities, the bad qualities, everything, when you can see yourself for the whole of who you are and stand in it. That energy is the most powerful thing ever and that and of itself will make people respect you more. Number nine, avoid emotional reactions and I know this one's going to be hard for some of you here, but your emotions don't always play a part in what you should do and how you should act in a situation. And this is coming from someone who used to let her emotions control her. You know, I'd feel like I missed my X for one day and then I text my X. I'd feel abandoned by my friends and then I text them this long paragraph. Like that's how I used to act. However, once I grew up and I acknowledged like where these emotions were coming from and how they were actually working to my detriment, I've realized that something needed to change and that change started within myself. There is a time in place for feelings. Okay, I'm not saying ignore your feelings, I'm not saying suppress them, I'm saying avoid the emotional reactions and handle your emotions in private so you can react in the best way possible. If you are feeling a very, very strong emotion, do not act on that emotion. Nobody is perfect with this, but if you can find an outlet for yourself, whether that is journaling, whether that is going to the gym, whether that is painting, whether that is doing something creative, do something to distract yourself from the emotion temporarily until you can find a resolution that makes sense. Instead of dwelling on the problem, start thinking, how can I solve this problem? How can this situation work to my benefit? It's so often that we encounter a situation in our lives and the first thing we want to do, like we react on our impulses and we make the situation worse for ourselves. And this is where I'm going to start talking about starting to regard yourself as a person that needs to be respected. Think of a person that you respect in life, whether that is think about like Albert Einstein or something, like someone who's really, really respected in society. Whoever that is for you, just think of someone that you highly, highly respect and think of them in the situation that you are in. How would this person react to this situation? Smart people utilize negative situations to their benefit. They see a negative situation and they go, okay, what is the best possible outcome for this? And how would I have to react in order to get that best possible outcome? Before you do something impulsive, ask yourself what your grandma would think if you did that. Like number 10, start regarding yourself as a highly respectable person. This is similar to the last one, but it more so goes into the affirmations of it all. Start affirming to yourself, I am respectable. I am someone that people look up to. I am someone that deserves respect, like genuinely feel like you deserve respect and don't deny yourself that respect from yourself. Learn how to respect yourself, like you expect other people to respect you. For example, if you were in a relationship with yourself, like you were a completely different person and you were giving this person respect, like, how would you act to yourself? Would you talk to yourself the way you've been talking to yourself? Would you tell yourself bad advice to go follow it? Would you treat your body how you've been treating it? As soon as I started thinking about how I would treat myself, if I was a completely different person, like seeing like the child version of myself, would I treat myself? Like how my inner monologue treats me? Most of you the answer is absolutely not. Replace negative thought patterns with yourself with positive thought patterns. As soon as you recognize that you are going into a negative thought pattern, choose to flip it around. And I know it's difficult to choose to flip it around, but you need to become consciously aware of where your mental state is. That is the only way you reframe your mind into regarding yourself as a person that should be respected. Is you identify when you are not respecting yourself through your mental state and you choose to act differently? If I've respected myself, how would I react? Would I react emotionally? What I throw this friendship out of the window? Or would I just accept this person for how they are and place them where they belong? Number 11 is to look at people's actions rather than the role they play in your life. Everyone knows actions speak louder than words. If someone is disrespecting you, you need to react in a way that would give yourself power back. For example, reacting emotionally and demanding respect, often turns off people from wanting to give you respect, regardless. Instead, withdraw your energy. Think of yourself as an eagle, right? You are flying through these trees. And all of the sudden, you reach these two trees that are super super close together. Do you just run straight through those trees and damage your wings? Or do you rise above certain obstacles? Do you choose to rise above certain circumstances that don't benefit you? I know it's easier said than done and I think there's a lot of nuance there. If someone is super close to you and they are disrespecting your boundaries, I think it's important to have a conversation with that person. But if it becomes a pattern, you need to start distancing yourself from this person. When we see people disrespect us and hurt us, it's so normal to want them to feel exactly how we're feeling. However, you need to realize at some point that it is a waste of your energy. Some people are not worth your energy and you must rise above the people who are just not worth it anymore and just don't burn bridges, just learn how to distance yourself from them. Instead of going over that bridge every day, choose to go a different way on your commute to work. Choose a different bridge to cross. Look at how people treat you and your reactions to help people treat you and it'll reveal a lot about how you feel about yourself. Use nuance. Okay. Number 12 is to stop taking disrespect so personally. Especially if it's someone in your life who is trying to go out of their way to disrespect you, oftentimes it's projection. Oftentimes they are trying to make you feel less than them because they don't feel like more. It is their only way in their brain to make you seem less than them. A lot of disrespect from people is usually just projection. Yeah, there's that 5% where it's like actually someone trying to hurt you and everything. But even then, oftentimes it's just people projecting their own hurt onto other people, hurt people, hurt people. And as soon as you realize this, when other people are disrespecting you, let's say they say a joke that wasn't really that nice. First of all, recognize that those people most likely aren't your friends. Recognize that some jokes people say are not just jokes. And number two, recognize that some people love to make fun of other people to make themselves feel better. Know how to defend yourself and call out people's shitty behavior. However, also know when to laugh it off and be unbothered by the situation. And number 13 is to surround yourself with people that you respect. A lot of you guys stay around people who you don't respect because it gives you a false sense of superiority. It's like, well, I don't really like myself, but at least I'm not like this person. That's my friend. Misery loves company. If you're a miserable person, you'll surround yourself with miserable people who you don't even respect. And let me just tell you honey, it shows. You don't like yourself, which means other people around you don't like themselves. And it's a constant power struggle because you are constantly feeling threatened by other people who start to be a little bit more successful than you. You will project on a people who are doing things with themselves and judge other people because you are not where you want to be. That is a loser's mindset. You need to start surrounding yourself with people who intimidate you, honestly. Surround yourself with people who when you meet them, you feel like you need to get your shit together. Instead of getting jealous, get inspired. Because when you surround yourself with people that you genuinely respect, you start taking on their attitude towards life. You stop seeing life as a competition and you start seeing life as something where you can learn from everyone. Everyone has their own journey and there's so many people in the world that want to help you get to where you want to be. When you're surrounded by a lot of unhappy people, you will often adopt this unhappy depressed mindset because you fear actually getting to the point and actually taking personal responsibility for your life. You'll hate people who are doing better than you because it's easier than acknowledging why you are not doing better for yourself. And that's a hard pill to swallow, but it's a necessary pill to swallow. Get yourself out of nasty environments with negative people. If you want to be respected by other people, you need to step into rooms where you respect others and you go out of your way to become a person worth respecting. With that being said, you guys, thank you guys so much for tuning into the Improvement for Invisible Spodcast. Be sure to check out all of my social media's Instagram at my life as Edge, TikTok and Snapchat at Natalie Edge. I'm also posting a lot more on Snapchat because I'm showing you guys my process of getting ready for a pageant I'm in. This is my first ever pageant and I'm really, really excited to represent my city. So if you want to learn more about that, be sure to go check out my social media. Thank you guys so much for tuning in this week to the Improvement for Invisible Spodcast. If you're tuning in on YouTube, be sure to like this video, subscribe, come on, like this video. Like, I know so many of you forget to like the video, but I put you guys on game this week, so be sure to like the video. Okay, bye guys, stay stupid.